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July 25 , 2009

The War on Christianity: a 12-Step Survival Guide


"There's a worldwide war on Christianity." (Rand Paul)

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The Religious Right, primarily in the USA but now worldwide through evangelical outposts and mega-churches, consider the secular humanist world to be in war against Christianity. The battleground is the definition of "hate speech" vs. religious freedom. These religious leaders repeatedly claim that Christianity in general, and Christians themselves, are everywhere under attack by liberal-democratic elites intent on globalization, international education, moral relativism and, above all, the humanist acknowledgement of the homosexual agenda at the expense of traditional marriage and the demise of family values.

And every war needs a survival guide.

Long demonized by various Christian denominations, author Belle Zebub, fresh from her recent graduation from the Alfred Jarry Institute of Pataphysics, outlines an essential 12-step program for surviving the looming War on Christianity, from recognizing the evangelical agenda of indoctrination to acknowledging the Vatican's campaign to legitimize paedophilia as a new form of sexual prophecy.

Using only truthful quotations from Christian leaders sans political correctness, sans sensitivity, sans respect comes a contemporary satirical travesty unrivalled anywhere in the oxymoronic discipline of "Biblical Scholarship".

"We are witnesses to a mighty struggle for the mind and soul of America in our day, and Christians cannot be indifferent to it... If the church loses the intellectual battle in one generation, then evangelism will become immeasurably more difficult in the next. The war is not yet lost, and it is one which we must not lose: souls of men and women hang in the balance." (William Lane Craig)

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