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May 21 , 2009

The Government Manual for New Wizards


The comedic duo behind The Government Manual for New Superheroes is back, and this time they've brought their magic wands and enchanted artifacts.

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EARTH (The Invasion Trilogy #1)Earth is being invaded. There was no warning and no time to stage any kind of defence. Instead countries started to go silent. They were no longer reachable and no one knew what was happening.So when Canada went dark; everyone knew America would be next.My name is Matilda, but everyone calls me…

The Government Manual for New Wizards is a hilarious, mock-official handbook for wannabe witches and warlocks who need advice on recognizing the onset of wizardolescence, understanding the laws of magic (and the magic of laws), choosing (or being chosen by) the right magical items and enchanted artifacts, dealing with the dead (grateful and otherwise), successfully hosting magical exhibitions, and the proper care and feeding of magical creatures.

Wands, charms, cloaks of invisibility, shoes of stealth (or sneakers), and other otherworldly accoutrements – it's all here, discussed tongue-in-cheek but with the utmost Governmental authority.

This entertaining guide offers such sage advice as:

* A demon is just as afraid of you as you are of it – provided, of course, that you are eight feet tall, composed of living fire, and capable of destroying a small village with a single angry thought. Otherwise, it doesn't find you frightening at all.

* When selecting educational programs, do not be tempted by solicitations from wizardry parchment mills. A so-called degree from such a place is not worth the scroll on which it appears to be inscribed. The ink will disappear not long after the school itself does.

The Government Manual for New Wizards is a sidesplitting spoof of all things wizard-y. 

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