Home » Nonfiction » HoffmannL. Douglas » Sex-on-a-Stick

February 09 , 2009



~~Sex-on-a-Stick~~The woman has it all. A prestigious job in the Capital Complex. Ahybrid Subaru with all-wheel-drive and satellite radio. ASuburban townhouse with stainless steel appliances and granitecountertops. Yes, she has it all and why not? She is, afer all,Pandora Tanner, Capital City tour-guide.When a chance encounter with a handsome face from her pastbrings Pandora face-to-face with her future, she is determined toright a wrong, and let destiny run its course. Then, a terroristattack at the Capital Complex proves that destiny is onPandora's side and her dreams, both wholesome and...otherwise... may actually come true.But "stick" technology is all the rage in Capital City. Lattes,donuts, TVs, cell phones, you name it; each and every thing isavailable - ON-A-STICK. Just look around on the street, in thestores, at schools, even in churches; it's obvious how attachedfolks have become to the modern convenience of ON-A-STICK.One man has watched very closely as this trend has swept thecountry. Townsend Effingham is perhaps the most powerful manin the world. Using "stick" technology, he devises a scheme tosave the insurance industry billions of dollars in payouts.Townsend enlists his girlfriend, the beautiful Evangelicalminister, the Right-Reverend Helen Damnation. Together theywill convince the country that God has changed the rules. That'sright! Beginning January 20th, when the next president - HelenDamnation (?) - takes office, sex will be forbidden, verbotten,banned, banished from the land. Sex will be evil, dirty, bad, bad,bad.the Right-Reverend Helen Damnatiopreaches. He doesn't expect them to quit cold-turky. God will,according to the Right-Reverend Helen Damnation, replace sexwith something better; a nicorette for sex, you might say. It'scalled: SEX-ON-A-STICK.
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